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Hanging in There with My Living Situation

As I sit here in my first floor, 2 bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment – forced to listen to my upstairs neighbor’s gospel music playing so loudly, that I can hear the words to her song – I think to myself about how HAPPY I am that I will not have to put up with this living situation much longer. Next Thursday, I will be CLOSING on my first home! And next Friday I will be moving out of this place!

And not to say this is a horrible place to stay, I actually planned to renew my lease (Management planned to up my renewal rate over $100!) But neighbors such as mine upstairs have proved to make it just that. Literally, from day 1, when I opened my apartment door to let the movers bring my stuff in – my upstairs neighbor had successfully FLOODED about 60% of my carpet from letting her washer overflow. (This happens again later down the line, too.) Needless to say, my first two weeks in my “new” apartment was spent with huge fans running non-stop to dry out my carpet, and my son was forced to sleep in my bed for the duration. His room and my living room were unusable. But I continued to stay here for two more years, ready to make it a 3rd year. Even the flooding of my apartment for a 3rd time from pipes bursting was not enough to force me to leave – the crazy increase in a renewal rate was. And boy am I glad they decided to be unfair, if it wasn’t for that move on their end – I would not be where I am now, which is at a two week countdown until I am in my new home.

“If my music ever gets too loud just let me know!” My upstairs neighbor told me that once – which I guess is a nice offer? But to offer this tells me you know you play your music ridiculously loud … thanks for the courtesy lady! She also has about 3 grandkids that come over every weekend that just run NON-STOP all over her apartment. It doesn’t seem to matter which room I move to – I can hear the little stinky feet stomping and running all over the place. Drives me crazy! It actually scares my son too because it ends up shaking some stuff down here. Man I hope she’s almost done getting ready for church and is about to leave … that music!

Anyway – even though it gets on my nerves, the closer I get to my departure date from here, the less disgruntle I get about her nonsense. I wish I was leaving this weekend, but two weeks! In two weeks I will be able to start waking up to a more pleasant surrounding. I cannot wait to live in MY home 🙂

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To My Ex: I Thank You

As I sit here, eating my delicious soup I made the night before – I think about how spicy it is, and how the spiciness must come from the Rotel. I wondered if all Rotel varieties were spicy – and I knew one person who might know – my son’s father: my ex. The reason he is the first person who comes to mind when I think about Rotel is because when I met him, that was the first time I had ever heard of Rotel. He liked to cook – and he is pretty good at it. The first meal he ever cooked for me (and his friend) was chicken Rotel. It was very tasty, but also quite spicy! And I was told it was because of the Rotel.

Looking back, I remember he was always the main one to cook our dinner just about every night (on the nights he was home, that is). I’d get my one or two nights of cooking one of the few meals that was familiar to me – so I wouldn’t mess it up. I used to always mess up spaghetti, it always came out bland. I even messed up a salad once. Since then, he always took over in the kitchen.

We never had the best relationship – it wasn’t the worst, but we definitely weren’t meant to be together. For some reason, we’d always find ourself back together, “trying to make it work”. It’s not uncommon for most people to have that one, unhealthy relationship that you’re stuck in – going round and round in a vicious circle of make-up’s and break-up’s. His talent for cooking was one of the reasons I stayed with him. Now I know that sounds crazy, but it’s true. I was never that great of a cook, and there were only a handful of meals I could cook on my own – that didn’t taste completely awful. My ex provided me great tasting dinners, night after night. 

It’s now been over a year since we broke up, the longest we have ever stayed apart before making up. I know this is truly the last time –  we will never get back together. The reason I am writing this is because – years ago, I was a poor excuse of a cook with him – and now, without him, I am an awesome cook 🙂  I have grown so much more being without him, than I ever did with him. Today, I am the most awesome person I can be and I am also with the most awesome person I could ever be with. I am thankful for that. I thank my ex for helping me to grow without him. Charles Willis, II – I love you so much!

So I thank you
Said I thank you

Yes I thank you

For making me a woman

Read more: ESTELLE – THANK YOU LYRICS

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Round of a Applause

I need to take the time to call out the fact that I have an amazing boyfriend.

He puts me first, and makes time for me – all the time 🙂

This past weekend he was invited out with some friends – and while he wanted me to go with him, I couldn’t because I had no babysitter…so he didn’t go either.

There was a time where I had a boyfriend who would leave me at the drop of a dime to go out with friends – and leave me with our son at home. I was never invited out with him, and he never even thought to take me. He would always go out with them.

So to finally have a man, who chooses to stay in with me because I can’t go – because of a child that isn’t even his means the world to me. There truly are good men out there – and there won’t be a moment that goes by that I recognize it.

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Fresh Start, New Beginning

I can’t believe it’s been over a year since I’ve started this blog. I can’t believe I’ve kept this blog for this long! A lot has changed since I started – I’ve blogged about the good & the bad I’ve experienced…continuing to grow from each entry.

A year ago I was with my son’s father – trying to make it work… but – in the end, some people just are not meant to be together, even if they did create a life together. But I will say, where I am at today is a good place, a very good place. I am happy. Extremely happy! My life is drama-free, stress-free (that is, when my 2 year old toddler isn’t driving my up the wall! haha), I’m working my baby clothes line again, & everyone around me is in good health.

I was also very lucky to have met a very awesome man on a boat at an old high school friend’s wedding reception 3 months ago – and I am proud to say I am now his girlfriend 🙂 I’ve been in relationships before, and I know this is going to sound cliche but, this one is definitely different from the rest. First of all, he isn’t a jerk, he’s genuinely a nice guy! And I love it, I love having a guy in my life who’s nice to me, someone who’s good to me – and does nice, small gestures that shows he cares. He’s into me, spends time with me, and likes to go out with me! (WHAAAAT!?!) He’s also great with my son, which means everything to me. He’s really making a special place in mine & Kaison’s lives. I never knew this type of guy existed, and I’m happier than ever that I’ve been able to find him. I don’t want to get too ahead of myself – or gush like crazy about all the amazing things about him – so I’ll just leave this short & sweet 🙂

Besides, I think it’s pretty obvious that I think he’s a freakin’ phenomenal human being who makes me extremely stinkin’ happy everyday! Love you guys & I love my life!